What It Really Means To Grow Up //

July 05, 2017

The up, downs, shitty, and realistic things about growing up....

As children, we notice everything. We take mental notes on how life goes, the roles people play in our lives, and what role we play in life. I remember as a child looking at adults, and thinking "Wow they're so old, I'll never be like them." But now, I'm one of those adults. I'm one of the people I thought I would never be. I'm growing up.

One of the interesting things about growing up is the mindset you inhabit. Making unconscious - some conscious - decisions on how you want to live your life. I recently read a quote that said, "Every decision you make affects the rest of your life," and speaks to me now more than ever.

Think about all the teachers you had, waiters, flight attendants, retail associates you've seen. 
But now.
You're one of them.

You're the doctor you had as a child.
You're the flight attendant serving a child like you.
You're a cashier checking out clothes you loved as a child.
You're a teacher to a student like you.

I was standing in Papyrus - one of the jobs where I work, and thought about the many times I've come in browsing for cards, journals, etc not once thinking I could one day be apart of the team. I went to the gym for years, and now I stand front desk working for one of them.

Though many people yearn for that, and wait their whole lives before coming a teacher, or doctor, or scientist, or pilot. The sad truth is that what we once thought we knew, we don't. It's a strange concept to me, because time is moving so fast, and I don't know where life is going. I feel like I just got out of high school yesterday, when in reality if I was going to be a teacher, I would be starting in just 3 years. How fucking crazy is that!

On the other hand, it's really cool to be apart of something - of life. To be someone writing books for new eyes, or a teacher teaching new people, a doctor saving new lives, and to watch life and the world grow. 65 million years ago, there was nothing but dinosaurs roaming the very streets we stand on today - and now, massive civilizations are being held, and we are advancing life. How cool is that?

It is a really shitty reality to grow up. I was fortunate, and still am, to not have to work at such a young age, to enjoy college, and my young adult life. I will miss that - miss having someone take care of me, having summers off, being free to do what I want. Though right now I'm not doing the jobs I want to be doing, I'm working part time to make extra money doing retail work, it will be nice when I finally get a paycheck for doing something I genuinely want to do.

And, it will be worth it. When I walk into a bookstore, and see my book sitting on the Best Seller's list.